Completely Stressed Out
I’m not having a very good July even though it’s only been a week. We can’t pay down debt and on top of that it has gone up because the student loans are growing. My wife got in a car accident, she’s okay but the repairs to the car will clear our EF. I am financially and emotionally drained right now and not sure when I’m going to bounce back.
So where do we go from here? I looked at her student loan statements the other day, she refuses to even bother with them, and the payments make me feel defeated. They can go into a forbearance or possibly economic hardship but we still need to find a way to pay them at some point. I guess for now I will put that issue aside since we have so many other fish to fry.
I know I don’t mention it too much but I still contribute to my 401k plan. I’m down probably 1.5k which is a huge chunk of money. At the same time while it’s down at the moment it will eventually go back up. It is still depressing to see the numbers go down so far and quickly, but that is the risk of the market. I’ve also debated the idea of stopping my contribution in order to increase cash flow to pay down debt.
Our vacation is planned here in the coming weeks and I doubt we can afford to go. My parents are picking up the bulk of our cost but the $600 intended to cover our expense may not cut it. With no EF to fall back on I hope the damage to the credit card will be minimal if we have to resort to it at all. If my parents were not involved in paying for this trip, it would be canceled.
Sorry I haven’t posted as frequently lately but I’m trying to keep the funk to a minimum. I’ll come up with a strategy at some point but right now I’m tired. The stress of the situation could very well be leading to depression. It makes me wonder how much more crap I have to do before things will get better.
I completely feel your pain, so much so that I’ve written a sort of response article here:
http://distilledrose.blogspot.com/2008/07/planning-for-accidents.html
I recently had an accident as well and it feels like my life was turned completely upside down. I hope that things get better and easier for you and that your lives are on the mend.
Hi my debt blog!
I totally understand your pain, as I am there myself. My july too has gotten off to a rocky start, and know how hard this is. Hang in there, and I’ll do the same. I added you to my blogroll as well, and hope you’ll consider the same.
~Family Man
I just don’t even know what words I can use that will help….I’m sorry you are dealing with this and it just seems to get worse. Maybe thinking of what a great testimony you will one day be able to give about your debt woes is going to be amazing…..we don’t know our strength until we’ve been tested…..you are in my prayers.
First of all, I’m glad that your wife is okay. That is the most important thing.
If you can, I would try and get both of your student loans on deferment or forbearance. I know that it is only temporary but it can buy you some time to build back your emergency fund. Hang in there and you will make it through it.
Down here in Texas we have some kind of program, goes something like this, if you teach at low income schools or schools in the “geto” they will help and pay your student loans, I belive after 5 or 7 years. Maybe she can look in to some program like that where you live.
And don’t get stressed out, check out my latest blog post 7/9 and you will see what I mean, remember things could be worse.
Here’s a few examples where you live:
Illinois Future Teacher Corps (IFTC) Program (formerly DeBolt): Illinois residents who plan to be teachers in the state are eligible for this program. The programs gives priority to those pursuing a teacher shortage discipline and/or making a commitment to teach in a hard-to-staff school, and minority students. Applicants are qualified to receive $5,000 or $10,000, and in some cases an additional $5,000 depending on the teaching commitment made. Applicants must be residents of Illinois and be enrolled in a certification program or teacher education program.
Source: www.collegezone.com/informationzone/
3392_3598.htm
Illinois Special Education Tuition Waiver Program: Illinois teachers or students who are pursuing a career in special education as public, private or parochial teachers are eligible for this award. This program will exempt such individuals from paying tuition and fees at an eligible institution for up to four calendar years.
Source: www.collegezone.com/informationzone/
3392_3600.htm
Minority Teachers of Illinois (MTI) Scholarship Program: Individuals of African American/Black, Hispanic American, Asian American or Native American origin intending to become teachers are eligible to receive up to $5,000 annually to pursue their teacher certification. Recipients must agree to teach at an Illinois public, private, or parochial school with at least 30 percent minority enrollment for each year they receive assistance. Recipients must maintain a 2.5 cumulative GPA. Applications are typically due March 1, with priority awarded to the first applications received.
Source: www.collegezone.com/informationzone/3392_3597.htm
Jim~Dont dwell on bills and student loans instead you guys need to act.Especially your wife MUST start bringing serious income. I mean you never told us how much she is making currently with two degrees? I believe if she starts making 40-50K you will be fine.She needs to be more aggressive.Since I start reading you blog your wife has been looking for a job, but no result. Why?
Jim, I’m sorry to hear that all this is coming down right now. I know it’s tough to see past the boulders weighing you down at a time like this. Best of luck!
I am so glad that your wife was okay though after the car accident. I tell myself that after my husband hit our both our cars within a span of 3 months! I was livid in some ways but glad he was okay. Foolishness.
But it will get better.
Jim, I’m glad your wife is okay and sorry to hear about your accident. Don’t stress the loans for now, things are bound to get better in the future. That’s why the federal ones are on 30 year schedules, you have lots and lots of time to pay them off. Sure it’s overwhelming to think about the numbers but just focus on doing the best you can for now!
Re: HS’s comment: The “geto”?! Seriously? Good grief. If you’re going to be perjorative, at least spell the word correctly. (And I’d bet the program doesn’t bill it quite that way, either.)
As for you, Jim, hang in there. I know how you feel. Sending you all best wishes that things turn the corner soon.
Aside from a loved one being in an accident, I know how you feel about debt. I am thinking of either selling my house, or resorting to a debt settlement option for my out-of-sight credit card debt. I used them to help a temporary live-in friend start a business and then he moved out of state and left me with a huge debt. I never should have helped him in the first place. Now I am screwed and not really sure where to turn.
It’s me again. I know you can get a deferment on your student loan, so maybe you could try that first. Good luck with everything, I wish I had more options I could offer you.
Disclaimer: Many, many years ago, I used to work at a student loan collection agency (now before I get comments, I was never a collector). I know people who work there…so I have some knowledge of the law here.
I can’t help but wonder why you’re paying off credit cards, which can be charged off, instead of paying down the student loan, which can’t be charged off. Shoot, essentially the only way to stop paying the student loan is to die. It’s always going to be there.
Yes, you can go into forbearance on the loan, get a financial hardship deferment, and possible a few other options, but, as you’re already aware, none stop the interest from accumulating, resulting in the amount due continuously going up, and up, and up. Start making payments on the student loan, forget about the credit cards. And I’m sorry to say, you’re wife’s attitude of when it comes to the student loan isn’t helping. Ignoring it isn’t helping. If anything, it’s adding to your anxiety and depression.
@Sallie’s Niece - this comment isn’t very smart (IMHO) “That’s why the federal ones are on 30 year schedules, you have lots and lots of time to pay them off.” yes, you might have 30 years to pay off the loan, but at what expense? He already said the current amount due is more than double the original amount. The longer you put it off, the more it’s going to cost. And again, you can’t charge off a student loan, but you can charge off a credit card debt.
I want to apologize for the harsh tone of my previous post. Rereading it, I see it’s very harsh and judgmental. Obviously I’ve no idea as the the circumstances of your situation, other than what you’ve posted, and what I’ve read (which are only a few of the posts), but I can’t help but get the feeling that you’re the one who is shouldering all the ‘responsibility, anxiety, depression’ of this debt hanging over your families’ head (especially considering your comment about your wife not wanting to deal with the student loan - it’s very insightful). If I’m wrong, I apologize, it’s just the impression I get.
I still think you should start paying on the student loan, and forget the credit cards, as you can charge them off…of course, if you’ve been current on your payments, and have no dings on the credit report, it might be better to continue to pay the credit cards. I just can’t understand when people suggest forbearance, etc as a way to hold off on paying the loan, as interest never stops accumulating and the next thing you know, that $25,000 student loan is now $45,000 or more, due to interest, fees, etc…
All the best to you in this journey.
I too can feel your pain.
But goo on your vacation and try to leave your problems behind. Remember your not having to pay for it. Their will be plenty of time when you return to worry about all the what if problems.
I download a program called got-guts and have been using it for over the last 18 months it really has given back my family peace of mind and hope. Also at one time they offered this program free. I only paid something like $30.00 dollars.
Remember have a great vacation it might be just waht the Dr. order.